Lulu was home for a few hours on Sunday but she didn’t have much time to hang out because of an obligation at 5:30 sharp. She had an instance.
What’s an “instance”? you might ask. I have no idea, but it has something to do with killing monsters. For an hour she hammered frantically at the computer keyboard while strange sounds emanated from the speakers. I ignored World of Warcrafts’s electronic growls and zaps, but perked up when I heard real-live men’s voices.
Please stay tuned for general rebuffing. Get your unstable flasks; they’re only good in here. Greystone Cartel: can you hear me now?
I think she said the term for these guys is “raid leaders.”
I’ll do a 3-2-1. Keep it nice and consistent. Soul well’s up. Please get your candy.
I’ve never heard full-grown adult males with wives and children talk like this.
Okay for a read-check. Please give Mr. X applied. Ready for the pull. Krotch is in a really odd spot. Watch out for him.
The more riveted I became, the more it annoyed Lulu, whose Personal Space I was invading as she innocently tried to concentrate on killing pixelated things.
Chakka back up. Pull the blind eye back. Skull is down. Ranged to kill Krosh. Kill Moon first. Take him down! Okay, everyone can go on Triangle.
Eventually I got bored with scribbling notes and decided to go buy an ice cream cone.
“What kind of ice cream do you want?” I asked Lulu, who remained myopically immersed in the game.
“Pauldrons.”
“What?!”
“Shoulders.”
Sunday’s Lesson: Never try to talk to someone who’s in an instance.
Monday’s Lesson: Don’t try to eat dinner while you’re watching Interview with the Vampire. Every time I took a bite of food, some guy would start slurping on someone’s spurting artery. I had to shut the TV off altogether when Tom Cruise sunk his fangs into a rat and squeezed its black blood into a wine glass.
Today’s Lesson: I can’t decide if it’s “Check your calendar each night so you don’t sleep through a forgotten appointment” or “In a vampire movie, the worst is never over; even though the rat scene is past, don’t try to eat dinner while watching, particularly when dinner is spaghetti with tomato sauce.”